I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
wow bdsm is so cute
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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