I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
