clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
