I'm really into asian looking animals
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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