so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
