I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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