Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
my vag is so smooth its legendary
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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