these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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