No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
