I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
