And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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