the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
This beer is not sobering me up at all
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
