He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
