Pants 0. Shit 1.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
