I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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