is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
it was like eating out sand paper
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
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