i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
