I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Randomize
