do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize