I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
These tits shall not be calmed
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
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