She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
