Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
He is an equal opportunity slut.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Randomize
