So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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