The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize
