This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Can you bring me the toilet please
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Randomize
