Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
