We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I intend to get homeless drunk
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
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