I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I love having hate sex.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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