...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize
