i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I'm like, not good at living.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
