I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
