dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
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