Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
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