Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize