i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize
