just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Green mimosas i think yes
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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