she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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