You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
