I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
