apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
my sisters under your porch take her home
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize