The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
