i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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