so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
