i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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