Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
