I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
