When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
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