dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
