He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
