I accidentally had phone sex last night
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize
